Getting over fitness fears

So I think I should start out by saying, at one time in my life I was a graceful dancer and after that had military training. That being said it has been sometime since I worked out consistently. I had my second child in February and I set my fitness goals low to make sure I actually did them.  I didn't want to set some crazy goal saying I was going to lose 50lbs in a month or something.

Before I had Frankie I was 125lbs and the day of labor I was 200lbs and when I left the hospital I was still 200lbs exactly until I was about 6 months pregnant with Delilah. I got up to 220lbs with her. I am now 185-190 lbs( i have been going up and down). See my problem is not maintaining, I'm actually very good at that my problem is losing the weight.  It probably doesn't help that I have no clue what those crazy machines do or how to use weights or how to breath when i run.  I spent most of my life a dancer. and for other dancers you know you don't feel like you are exercising you just go to practice and do your thing. Exercise is so new to me!

I have been walking a lot more since moving to Hawai'i and have recently been going to the gym more. I have had the same fear lots of girls have when going in the gym. What am I doing? and who is going to laugh at me and think I'm weird while doing it?  But you know what people I'm here to tell you, no one cares, be able to laugh at yourself and other people will laugh with you instead of at you. Example: lol last night at the gym I got on a machine it had crazy bars and a freaking seat belt haha well i got on it straped myself in and laughed my butt off as I read the instructions aloud to my friends on the surrounding machines none of us knew how this thing worked. So I tried my best to do what the little guy in the diagram told me and oh man was I wrong. One of the people working out around us saw me shockingly not upside down in this torture device haha but he came over and gave me instruction.and i got it down for the most part.

I used to be oh so serious I only wanted to do things if I did them perfect and I didn't even want to try if I had no idea what I was doing or if there was a chance of failure. That attitude set me back in dance and in life. I have since learned to laugh and just be silly.  I think it is helping me to be a better mom and friend and person in general. I love life and love learning and trying new things. It's awesome!

I am also going to be trying a new thing and getting over my fear of running in daylight in a 5k no less it's only 3.1 miles or whatever but for me it is a huge step and also one of my fitness goals for this year. My husband thinks I'm crazy and I wont get up in the morning, but you know what I have to do it for me and maybe even for the babies even tho they are too young to know I want to set an example of putting your mind and body to doing things you set out to do. I'm just so excited for all this good change. the 5k is sep 22,2012 and I will post pictures and whatnot. So what do you say get up and get outside today or to the gym or just change one lil thing like taking the stairs instead of the elevator.